I belong to the generation that did not have many toys whereas we never needed more. If it was enough, I am not able to judge, but we were satisfied. However, what we needed were friends to play with. A friend with a bike or a ball was preferred and if we had one we were happy otherwise we would make our sticks and pebbles do.
Spending all day outside was the premium privilege granted to us by our parents for doing our homework on time or behaving well at school. These privileges went to a higher level during the holidays. Yet, these were just a few. Exactly, in my country, New Year and our birthdays were the only two days when we got gifts. On other occasions, we could only expect a sweet or with a little wealthier guest a bar of chocolate, a whole 80g.
That is how we learned to respect the family, holidays and toys, all of them deeply intertwined making the unbreakable and dependable chain.
Parents – Toy – Children Relationship
Family plays a key role during holidays. That is why Christmas is commonly called a family holiday. The whole family is finally at home, functioning as a single unit, gathered together around the Christmas Tree with nicely wrapped gifts under it.
It is never clear if the kids are happier because of the gifts or maybe because their hard-working parents are finally at home, giving them attention and showing affection through holiday miracles.
Anyhow, toys serve as a bridge between parents and children. Having their kids realize that they work hard to afford a nice gift leaves parents at ease for a while, something like redemption for being absent from home. Toys serve as a kind of compromise for all the time that stands between the family members.
Therefore, to serve the purpose, the toy has to be the right one. The “right one” doesn’t necessarily mean the toy that the kid wants, but the toy that will help your child develop their skills – motor, mental and social as well as strengthen their creativity and imagination.
Responsibility
Toys serve to keep a good relationship between parents and children. It all started with a kind of “blackmail”. Kids had to be good for months, some less fortunate ones had to be good all year long, to be rewarded for Christmas. Yet, it served well for some time. As soon as school started in September, kids tidied their rooms, did well at school and obeyed their parents. The toys they got were sacred, they cherished them.
However, times change, parents started working like crazy and their unease about spending so much time away from the family had to be somehow compensated. In this unfortunate case, toys, as the most reliable link between parents and children, were used, or if I am allowed to say misused.
Consequently, the whole idea of being good to get a present fell apart. Children, smart as they are, broke the myth that they did not have to be obedient to get at a present. They realized they would get it anyway, so there was no point in being good anymore.
Expecting Something in Return
The reciprocity of giving a gift to a child is never openly expected, but everyone silently anticipates something in return from their children. Many of us expect good behaviour, other better marks at school, but some parents expect a little, something like a kiss or a hug.
Some countries cherish the tradition of gift exchange where gifts are symbolic, not posh and expensive, which I find a valuable practice. Kids should be taught not only to receive but also to give as the Christmas spirit suggests. Each person has something to give and sometimes even a smile is enough.
Giving symbolic gifts is imaginative play for kids, expressing their artistic and original selves. Certainly, the receiver of this original present has to be considerate and appreciative of the kids’ effort to make an impressive gift. It is not advisable to get the kids used to big and expensive gifts. To stay on the safe side, a modest present is the best one.
Bringing up Respectful Children
Family above all has the highest value in our lives. Eventually, toys, showing the affection of the giver, are also highly ranked.
As I have mentioned, in my time, toys were rare which made them wanted and appreciated. In the modern world, modern rules make toys almost redundant. Parents, having to cope with supporting the family, have to spend so much time away, so they use every opportunity to express their love by giving toys to their children. Therefore, kids get fed up with the same scheme, are bored with so many toys and become disrespectful of their families.
Modern families have to be careful about the time of giving toys. Too many toys lead to less respect not only for the toys but also for the family which is of great importance in the modern world.
Finally, “earning” toys makes responsible children. They need to learn to give and only then expect a reward.
A Piece of Advice
To sum up, the bridge between parents and children must be well-preserved to keep the institution of the family functioning. Gifts, in our case toys, serve to keep the family together despite all the difficulties of the contemporary world that tries to break family ties. Furthermore, toys remind family members of love and the importance of their little community.
However, children should not be showered with toys so often. On the contrary, regularity in giving gifts must be established. Children have to know when to expect them, moreover, they have to be aware of the reason they got them. If they get them for no reason, neither will they appreciate them nor will they do their best to earn them.
Finally, do not underestimate the significance of picking the right toy! Make sure to follow the rule – the right toy at the right time for the right purpose – to bring up healthy, appreciative and responsible children!
